john_amend_all | Seen today in a second-hand bookshop

Crossposts: http://john-amend-all.livejournal.com/137157.html

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could well be canon

Seen today in a second-hand bookshop

i) A sign on a shelf reading 'General + Outsize Royalty'. That'll be Henry VIII and George IV, then.

ii) Various romance novels, whose titles I noted pursuant to later googling them and adding the summaries to the generator. I decided to start with The Case of the Accidental Heiress. I put it in the generator, and it went all psychic on me straight away.

475) The Case of the Accidental Heiress by Victoria Pade

The Case: An accidental heir.

The Client: the Second Doctor was dead. At least, that's what everyone told him. But as he pursed his lips and moved his muscles, he knew he was very much alive. . . And in a heap of trouble!

The Detective: Sensuous, long-legged Polly Wright had rescued many a swain in distress. But this new client. . . Despite his enormous inheritance and his gorgeous body, he was simply nuts - or about to pull off an incredible scam! How could the Second Doctor expect her to believe that he had been switched - heart and soul into another man's body?

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LOL!

I have a couple more for you, too, if you want them. (My reading habits have degenerated a lot lately. Or improved, given how easily I can read these and how many headaches all the other books give me):

PICKPOCKET COUNTESS by Bronwyn Scott

It's Brandon Wycroft's duty as the Earl of Stockport to catch the 'Cat', a notorious thief who is stealing from local rich homs to feed the poor. Discovering the Cat is a woman, he changes his plan of action - to a game of seduction!

Mysterious and tempting, she teases him - and, as the net closes around the Cat, Brandon realises he wants to protect her as well as bed her. But the only way to catch her is to spring the parson's mousetrap - and make her his countess!

(It wasn't even a little bit riffing on Batman/Catwoman at all, obv. :lol:)

THE FALL OF A SAINT - CHRISTINE MERRILL

Honourable - and handsome to boot! - Michael Poole, Duke of St Aldric, has earned his nickname 'The Saint'. But the ton would shuddder if they knew the truth. Because, thrust into a world of debauchery, this saint has turned sinner!

With the appearance of fallen governess Madeline Cranston - carrying his heir - St Aldric looks for redemption through a marriage of convenience. But the intriguing Madeline is far from a dutiful duchess, and soon this saint is indulging in the most sinful of thoughts... while his new wife vows to make him pay for his past.

SAPPHIRE by Rosemary Rogers

Sapphire Fabergine will never be satisfied until she claims what is rightfully hers! But in confronting the aristocratic family who disowned her before she was even born, Sapphire finds that her father is dead and that his title has passed to an American, Blake Thixton.

Blake believes that Sapphire is nothing more than a fortune hunter. Kidnapping her, he presents her with a choice - become his mistress or his maid! But Sapphire will not compromise her quest, even for the man she has come to desire...

479:

479) PICKPOCKET COUNTESS by Bronwyn Scott
[Harry Sullivan / Ace McShane]
It's Ace McShane's duty as the Countess of Stockport to catch the 'Cat', a notorious thief who is stealing from local rich homes to feed the poor. Discovering the Cat is a man, she changes her plan of action - to a game of seduction!
Mysterious and tempting, he teases her - and, as the net closes around the Cat, Ace realises she wants to protect him as well as bed him. But the only way to catch him is to spring the parson's mousetrap - and make him her consort!

This isn't going to end well for Harry. (Also, this prompt could get very odd with Red Dwarf characters).

(Also also, 'spring the parson's mousetrap' sounds like a very strange euphemism).

480:

480) The Fall of a Saint by Christine Merrill
Honourable - and handsome to boot! - Arnold Rimmer, Duke of St Aldric, has earned his nickname 'The Saint'. But the ton would shudder if they knew the truth. Because, thrust into a world of debauchery, this saint has turned sinner!
With the appearance of fallen governess Sara Kingdom - carrying his heir - Arnold looks for redemption through a marriage of convenience. But the intriguing Sara is far from a dutiful consort, and soon this saint is indulging in the most sinful of thoughts... while his new wife vows to make him pay for his past.

I suppose Sara Kingdom is a step up from Baldrick, but Rimmer's got an awful lot of past to pay for. (It was also very tempting to let the 'l' go missing from 'St Aldric'.)

481:

481) Sapphire by Rosemary Rogers
Sodoff Baldrick will never be satisfied until he claims what is rightfully his! But in confronting the aristocratic family who disowned him before he was even born, Baldrick finds that his father is dead and that his title has passed to an American, James T. Kirk.
Jim believes that Baldrick is nothing more than a fortune hunter. Kidnapping him, he presents him with a choice - become his lover or his footman! But Baldrick will not compromise his quest, even for the man he has come to desire...

Oh dear. We all know what sci-fi Baldrick looks like...

483) Francesca by Sylvia Andrew
Emma Swan is mortified when Vila Restal reappears in her life — he stole the most magical, illicit kisses from the young, innocent Emma! And she swore never to forgive him after being punished for her 'wanton' behavior….
Now, on her inheritance, Vila has returned to offer the unimaginable — marriage! An indignant Emma refuses, but very soon she walks headlong into danger — and the only man ready to sacrifice his life, and reputation, for her sake is Vila…

Incidentally, in one of the other ones I typed up, the male character's original surname is 'Harden'. I suspect this to be one of Nanny Ogg's single entendres.

Edited 2016-05-28 23:10 (UTC)

Yay, thanks! I thought the Cat one was particularly good, despite the potential for Red Dwarf confusion. And, oh dear, Harden... Romance authors... *shakes head*

I found another one like that today: Cade Hardesty. (He's a firefighter. Of course).

Well, to be fair, I don't think it'd go better for Rimmer the other way round (or, the generator gave me this):

480) The Fall of a Saint by Christine Merrill
Honourable - and handsome to boot! - Steel, Duke of St Aldric, has earned his nickname 'The Saint'. But the ton would shudder if they knew the truth. Because, thrust into a world of debauchery, this saint has turned sinner!
With the appearance of fallen tutor Arnold Rimmer - carrying his heir - Steel looks for redemption through a marriage of convenience. But the intriguing Arnold is far from a dutiful consort, and soon this saint is indulging in the most sinful of thoughts... while his new husband vows to make him pay for his past.